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Tuesday, January 8, 2019

It's not a sport, don't keep score...

No matter how much making whoopie makes you wanna cheer, remember, it's not a sport...
so don't keep score.

So I was again scrolling through random mouse clicks, falling deeper into the rabbit hole of the interwebs, and I stumbled across a link to this article: 

It was about relationships, and I was sure it had something to do with communication problems so I of course was like 'pscht, this is something I should check out.'

So I did, and as I was reading this article, I got to thinking. After letting the information stew and thinking about it relates to not just me, but to possibly a wider application (a.k.a. sex), it struck me that people don't just keep score of wrong doings or chores, but they also keep score in bed as well.

Which leads us to

How many times have you heard someone say "I always initiate", or "You got to come first the last three times, it's my turn", or "I'm always doing all the work", or "I got the towel last time, you get it". 

(Actual footage of the dance I do when I offer to get the towel after me and hubby have sex. Try getting that image out of your head.)

Seriously though. There's nothing more annoying than knowing that someone is keeping a scorecard of the naturally spontaneous act of intimacy. 

 Stop it.

PSA: Don't get me wrong, there's nothing wrong with communicating a frustration if you want to change things up or if you aren't feeling satisfied in an area of your sexual health. By all means, feel free to ask someone if they would mind taking it slower and letting you finish first this time so that you can take your time pleasing them instead, or asking if they could turn the tables and surprise you with a little unscheduled prompting from their side next time. 

Relax, we all get into habits. It's human nature and it's cool to change that up, but sometimes habits are built upon the things that we know work, also. Try not to make it into a 'scorecard' mentality and instead look at it as the 'standard operating procedure' that you can innovate from time to time. Always look forwards, not backwards. (You know, unless that's your thing. It puts a crick in my neck, personally.)

End of lesson.
No homework tonight, boo. Go forth and free your mind. 

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