Tuesday, January 30, 2018

Make it sing...

Today's blog is just for fun, but I hope that it helps inspire a little creativity in your life today!

So... In my vast expanse of Google searches during this week, I've come across a multitude of crazy, interesting, sad, funny, and sometimes inspiring tidbits.
(I just love the sound of the word tidbit. I feel like if you were talking fast enough, and drunk enough, it would be easy to say bid-tits instead. I mean, what exactly is a bit of tid anyway?)

Amongst my interesting discoveries this week, I found that there is a plethora of condoms that I've been completely ignorant about. I guess that's the hazard of married life. You don't get to experience that AWESOME trip to the store for prophylactics (say that five times fast) and baby-daddy-prevention.

Being less of a shopaholic than your average lady-type, I have a feeling I would be less prone to hang out comparing features, colors, sizes and scents. I'd be more of a GRAB-and-GO kinda gal.


But in light of this new found information I have, I feel like this should spur a little bit of shopping fun so that I can thoroughly test out the new assortment of rubbers (thank you Mr. Goodyear) that are out on the market. I mean, we could all stand to be a little more familiar with those good old "love gloves".



Here's something even more interesting that I came across in my tom-fuckery on the masterful interwebs... did you know that someone said that a man in Hungary invented a MUSICAL CONDOM?





Let me assure you right now, I couldn't find any evidence that this was truth and not a hoax, but even the concept was pretty hysterical to research. I mean, it was claimed that when you unrolled the condom, it played a communist hymn "Arise, Ye Worker", which is enough to make me spit out my hot tea while reading it.



No wait wait wait... that's not all. Even better is that there were rumors of another musical condom years later touting a "jimmy hat" that had sensors on it that would vary the music it played depending on position and rigor of the wearer.
Talk about performance pressure!!!



I'm telling you, I have a hard enough time being distracted by the thought of one of our kids knocking on the door in the middle of "grand events" that there is NO WAY I would be able to make it to "mountain-top" while the frickin flight of the bumble bee was playing inside my hoo-haw.

Try making love without this song popping in your head the most inopportune moment now... I dare ya.


HOMEWORK:
So here's a thought provoking question for your week...
IF YOUR DICK WAS A BOOMBOX,
WHAT SONG WOULD IT PLAY???



(If you're looking for some ideas of narrowing down your own shopping options, perhaps it would help to read this link which shared a blogger's own adventure in condom trial and error:
http://www.slate.com/articles/life/shopping/2005/03/rubber_match.html )